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At first, their eyes stared at me in disbelief, but then they fell to the floor as I described those nights with my scoutmaster in the tent. The abuse continued for more than three months. Finally, I told my parents what was happening during my scouting trips. They listened, shifting in their seats. Unfortunately, this was just the start of the trauma I suffered at the hands of this scoutmaster. This is what it is like to be a child overtaken by an abusive adult. Tomorrow I would wake up and say to myself, "This was just a bad dream," and then it would all go away. Otherwise why would it be happening to me?Īll I could do was stay frozen and act as though I was asleep and then maybe he would stop and I could pretend like it never happened in the morning. This was my punishment and I deserved it. This was my fault for wanting to come in first place so badly. If I had come in second place, maybe he wouldn’t be here right now. I tensed up and became angry with myself for winning the earlier challenge. Do I call out and scream? Do I jump up and run? To where? Maybe, I thought, if I lay still and close my eyes and cry he will just go away. I felt my throat tighten and a wave of panic overtook my body. I was still, not knowing what to do. Hundreds of former Boy Scouts reveal new sexual abuse claims, exposing 150 alleged pedophiles Although it was dark I knew it was my scoutmaster I recognized his voice in his breathing. I was sleeping soundly, alone in my little tent, but awoke to a strange feeling of hot breath on my neck and someone moving his hands all over my body, on the front of my pajamas. That night, the sky was black and the stars sparkled. Winning that game unfortunately changed my life forever.
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He smiled and nodded when he saw me arrive first: There I was - the winner, his winner - the best Boy Scout around. Kelly' filmmaker on overdue sex abuse charges: Were girls of color ignored? The world felt limitless.ĭonna Rice Hughes: Coming to terms with my own sex abuse in a 'Leaving Neverland' moment
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I was learning how to be a better citizen, the best person I could possibly be.
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I always strove to be the first one to earn a new badge or acknowledgement and, when I finally grew old enough to become a Boy Scout, my sense of wonder and excitement for the organization only deepened. Like most young boys, my favorite time was attending the campouts and being in nature. We got to canoe, fish, shoot bows, tie knots, start fires and so many other things. Lessons centered around patriotism, service, sportsmanship and spirituality. I was about 6 years old when I joined the Cub Scouts in 1969. I adored going to the Cub Scout meetings - it felt important and it was exciting learning new skills and listening to stories of how to be a better person. This column was originally published June 10, 2019. The author of this column is one of those other nearly 800 clients. The lawyers also represent nearly 800 other clients alleging abuse while scouting. 5, lawyers filed a lawsuit against the Boy Scouts of America on behalf of a client alleging sexual abuse by his former scoutmaster.